Why Life is the Way It Is

Hannah was in the kitchen cooking for her family of five when Michelle barged in.
"Mom! You'll never guess what just happened to me."
"Michelle, what in the world are you going on about now?"
"Well, I was in the garden thinking about things and you know how I've been feeling like something is missing. So I was trying to figure out what it was when all of a sudden I looked down at me fee and the weren't on touching the ground."
"They what?! Are you trying to tell me that you were flying?"
"Not flying exactly but floating, or hovering."

Hannah shrugged it off thinking it was one of their games they usually play.
"That's nice honey. Just don't tell anybody unless you want to be hung for being a witch."
"You don't believe me do you?"
"No I don't, but I do believe that its time for you to grow up and stop with these little games of yours."
"Yes ma'am."
"Good. Now set the table. Dinner is almost ready. Go tell your father and your brothers to do the same."

Michelle was walking around the garden looking at the different array of flowers, contemplating her life and where it was taking her. Lately she had been feeling like there was something missing. She had always been content with herself, but that was it. It wasn't until recently that she started thinking that there should be something more. As she was thinking about this she noticed something strange was happening. She was floating! Literally floating in mid-air. Just as soon as she noticed it she landed on the ground. She ran into the house to tell the one person that she could tell anything and everything to.

You would think that a 21 year old guy would act a little more mature about things when it comes to a relationship, but no thats where you would be wrong. You try and tell him that you can't do it anymore he automatically thinks you are cheating on him. You tell him no that you just can't do it anymore and he says we'll talk tomorrow. Tomorrow comes and goes with no word from him. You happen to go on myspace to check you stuff and you see that he has put you up for sale on the own your friends app, changed his status to single, and taken you off of his top friends. The entire time you're thinking, "Really? This is how we handle things?" How in the world is he supposed to know that I was even talking about breaking up? Granted I was but as far as he knows I could've been talking about work or a friend. Apparently he had been thinking the same thing since he's not willing to talk it out. Maybe it was something that we could've fixed and if it wasn't then at least we might not have ended it on such bad terms. But instead he had to go the middle school route when we are both adults. Maybe this was a sign that it wasn't going to work out between us in the end.

Sorry I haven't been on in a while. Life has kept me pretty busy. Military finance is such a wonderful place to deal with. For that matter, finances in general are a bitch and a half to deal with. First I haven't been getting my meal deductions since September so they were going to take all that out at once but now they are trying to take Jan and this first part of Feb out at once and then take Sept through Dec over a 12 month period. Then my Dad calls me and says, "I know you've been having these finance problems but apparently somebody got a hold of your account info and started using it. Luckily the bank caught before any charges could go through. So even if I had money right now which actually I do since we got paid on Fri I couldn't even get into it until the bank sends my new pin number. Then I've been in for a little over a year now and I'm still in training. I haven't even started my job yet. So its just been one thing after another. But other than that I love it here. Its soo pretty and we have a great view of the mountain from the dorm.

Why can't people mind their own fucking business? Ok so I was dating this one guy and he turned out to go all psycho on me cuz he couldn't get a hold of me for two hours cuz my phone died. I couldn't handle him having anger issues cuz I dealt with that and some of you know how that went....not good. Well me and this other guy started talking and eventually started dating and he was everything I had ever looked for down to the "T". Taking me out dancing in the dark in this wooded area which I have always thought was romantic along with many other things. But now I have other people in the dorms thinking that we are moving to fast and when he left to go home and then to Montana where he will be stationed. After he left I had no desire to go out and hang out with people. If they came up to me and said we should hang out then I'd be like alright thats cool. Where to? But other then that I was content just staying in my room. But there are people saying that I need to get out of my room when I was only in there for two days and then apparently there are bets going around as to who I'm going to go after since Anthony isn't here....since I am going after people cuz I stay in my room. But Oh well its whatever they want to think. I know whats in my heart and they don't. They weren't there.

So here's the latest on whats been going on with me. As you all know I had plans on getting married to Jef....but that went down the drain when I realized how he really was. Now we are broken up completely not just the engagement but the whole thing and I have found somebody else. I met him here at tech school in California. His name is Andrew. Its kinda funny how we started dating. There were 3 guys who like to stalk all the new female airmen that come in so Andrew was dubbed my bodyguard. Then everything just kinda went from there. We went to Six Flags and had an amazing time even though there was "supposed" to be no PDA since we are in the military but you all know how I am. What rules, right. Rules are just there for us to break aren't they? Well I guess I better get off here. Got some more rules to break if you know what I mean...heh heh heh. ;)

So I know that most of you know the news on my recent relationship status but I wanted to post it on here so everybody would know about it. I'M GETTING MARRIED!!!! I met him on the bus to basic training and he ended up being in my brother flight. At first we didn't really talk but he always asked me how I was doing cuz on the bus he promised me that he would watch out for me. One day we had kitchen detail and he was working the window getting dishes and all that good stuff and I was wiping down tables so I would have to give him empty ketchup bottle or random trash that I found on the floor cuz trainees are messy and he would say, "Dang Pool, if you keep giving me these I'm gonna think you like me." I just smiled and kept doing my job which included giving him more trash so he said, "Alright Pool. I see whats going on." Then we were talking later about the different jobs we had and our different tech schools and that was the end of it for a while cuz we obviously weren't allowed to talk to each other. but our fifth week we had what we called a trainee-shake-a-booty on Christmas and I was looking for him but couldn't find him until we were falling back in to go back to our squadrons. I asked him where he was and he asked if I was trying to find him so I said maybe. Then that night I guess he started writing me a letter and thats how it all got started. When he got his pics in he gave me one and on the back asked if I would be his girlfriend. While he was in tech school (and still is) he was worried about not getting stationed on the same base so he figured out that the only way it would work would be if we got married so we agreed that we would find a way to get married so we could get stationed together. Well one of the girls kept calling him my fiance and I told him about it and he said that he wanted to propose even though he wasn't there. So he told me to get the flight that I was staying with in the Day Room. So I did and got them in a circle and he proposed right there in front of everybody. And when he comes down this weekend we are going to talk to the chaplin to see if he can marry us and get our rings. YAY!!!!

So heres the latest on whats going on. Im still a holdover and they dont have my waiver ready which was supposed to be done om friday. So I will be here another week. YAY GO ME!

ok so i figured out my number. its 210-875-7019. please call me. i would love to hear from you guys and see how yall are doing.

hey everybody. sorry i left so suddenly. kinda didnt have a choice. im in the air force now and loving it even though ive been in holdover status for 4 weeks. id write more but im doing this all by phone. ill write more later. i have a diff number now so when i remember what it is ill post it. love you all!

I went surfing through the internet looking for random quotes. So here's a few that I found that I really liked.

"It takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but an entire life to forget them."

.::.You dont always get what you want, so cherish what you have.::.

Many may hate me,few may like me,but there's only one who matters...the one reading this.

Have you ever wondered what hurt more?!?
Saying something and wishing you hadn't...or saying nothin g and wishing you had?

The one who makes you cry isn't worth your tears. The one who is worth your tears would never make you cry.

I wrote your name in the sand, but the waves washed it away. I wrote your name on my hand but I washed it the next day. I wrote your name on a piece of paper but I acciedenatally threw it away... I wrote your name in my heart and forever it will stay!

You know you're in love when all you can think about is that one special person and you can't stand to be away from them for more then one second. You miss then even though they're standing right next to you. You fall asleep thinking about them, and dream about them every night.

-:- love was a word I didn't believe
dreams were just a myth
but my belief
of things changed
the day that you found me -:-

I wanted a guy that was nice and in touch with his feelings, but then i realized..they all have have boyfriends already.

Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.

The hardest thing in life is watching someone you love love someone else.

"People say that Love is giving someone the ability to destroy you, but trusting them not to.
If you really love me tell me what I want to hear, but those other words are what I fear.
If you really love me, would you stand by my side?
Would you care for me? Be there for me? Be there when I cry?
Don't tell me you love me when you have someone else on your mind.
Don't tell me you want me when you have someone else by your side.
I really don't wanna hear it, because you'll break my heart.
Don't try to fix what is broken. Don't even start.
If you didn't notice...I'm In love with you."

Missing you isn't what hurts... It's knowing that I once had you, that breaks my heart.

You think you know but you have no idea the way I loved you, the way I cared, but now your gone and I can't live without you, my heart still hurts for you, my soul still longs for you, but my head tells me you are the one I have been waiting for my whole life.

You love me, you hate me, but all you ever do it forget me. Why say you love me, why say you hate me, jus' live your life without me and I'll live mine without you. We'll be happy, we'll be free, no more hating, no more loving, jus' you and me... apart forever.

The best things in life aren't things.

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll still land among the stars.

When you were born, everyone around you was smiling and you were crying. Live your life so that when you die, you're smiling and everyone around you is crying.

10% of life is what happens to you, and the other 90% is how you react to it.

Everything is all right in the end. If it's not all right, it's not the end.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Turned Away

I turned away not knowing
How you were going to react.
I turned away not knowing
All of the facts.
I turned away without you
Because you had done something wrong
I turned away without you
And now our love is gone.

My heart was set,
My soul; free.
It was all planned
For me.
But now you've turned away
Because I just did.
Now we've turned away,
Because our love also did.

I am who I am...If you don't like it get over it!!

Everday I wonder why
Why things go bad everytime i try
Try to get close and friends push you away
Try to fall in love and only the pain stays
Life is never easy
And relationships are always hard
But through the good and the bad
Things usually work out in the end

UGH! WHY THE FUCK IS HE BRINGING THIS SHIT UP NOW?! Ok let me back up and explain myself real quick. This didn't happen to me it happened to Becky. Her and one of our friends TJ were playing cards in the piano room in the dark and Luke comes in and asks why they were in the dark. Becky says that its because they like the dark and Luke says that he wasn't talking to her he was talking to TJ. Becky says, "Ok well then you don't need to make it so general." Then he starts going off on her. He says that he's cool with the fact that Becky is opinionated but the fact that her opinions are wrong bugs him, and that she doesn't understand him, nobody does. Then he brings me into it even though I'm not even there, saying that I told him everything that Becky told me when we first started dating. That he just tries to get into girl's pants and then he breaks their hearts which is exactly what he did to me. Then he says that he's not like that and he doesn't do any of that and this that and the other. I just wanna know why he is bringing this shit up now. Just when I finally turn my life around, get over him, and find one of the most awesome guys on the face of the earth. I just UGH! What was I thinking then? Why didn't I see the way he was before all this shit started happening? I...UGH!!!!!!!

50 girl questions


Answer them with truth:

What color is your bra today?
tan

Do you straighten your hair?
sometimes...most of the time I just blow dry it

Do you worry about the size of your boobs?
Not gonna lie...I do at times even though everybody tells me not to

What's your favorite girly magazine?
Whatever has the best cover shot? I guess...not really picky about them

Do you wear clothes/shoes/jewelry that's uncomfortable?
shoes definitely shoes

Did you ever spend all day/night getting pretty for a guy?
depends...when does the day start and the night end?

Did you ever cry during a romantic movie?
What girl hasn't?

Would you leave the house without makeup on?
I actually did that today and do that most of the time as well. Only wear makeup every now and then

Do you consider making out "unladylike"?
of course not

On the scale of 1-10 how fun is shopping?
Clothes: 7
Makeup: 1
Shoes: 4
Purses: 1
Jeans: 8
Dresses: 10
Jewlery: 6
DVDs: 7
Decorations for my room: 4
Computer stuff: 1
Groceries: 7

Are you spoiled?
Well when your parents have pretty much bought everything for you I would say yes I am spoiled

Do you think lip gloss is the best?
It is good indeed, but maybe not the best

Do you freak out if you miss your favorite shows?
OMG I can't believe I missed Heroes last night. GER!

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
Depends on how much time I have when I wake up

Do you wear sweatpants/pajama pants to school?
Nope can't say that I have

Do you like skater boys?
ummm...don't know, haven't really met one

Is pink the best color in the world?
Heck no...its blue
Have you ever dressed unlike yourself to impress a guy?
No.

Do you often wish there was something you could change?
I wish that my boobs were possibly just a little bit bigger.

Do you dress up too much for holidays?
I don't think I do...do I?

Do you like to wear dresses?
When its not freezing cold outside and I won't freeze my ass off cuz Kaitlyn wants us to dress up and go eat for Valentine's Day. :)

On a scale of 1-10 how much do guys confuse you?
hmmm...that's a toughy...to me it depends on the guy...some guys are confusing and some aren't

In the past 24 hours have you hung out with a guy?
No...actually I was trying to avoid hanging out with one that has suddenly become my dog practically.

LAST PERSON...

1. You hung out with?
My Roomie Danni of course

2. You texted?
Sorry to say that I don't have text

3. You were in a car with?
Jason cuz he was bringing back home from Dyess

4. Went to the movies with?
Danni and Kaitly to see Epic Movie

5. Last person you kissed?
That unfortunately would be Ryan

6. Went to the mall with?
Becky and Danni

7. You talked on the phone to?
JOSH!!!

8. Made you laugh?
hmmm...depends...laughing hard would probably be Becky...giggling would be Josh

WOULD YOU RATHER...

1. Pierce your nose or tongue?
nose

2. Be serious or be funny?
funny of course

3. Drink whole or skimmed milk?
whole

4. Die in a fire or get shot?
Shot because hopefully it would be faster than burning

5. Spend time with your parents or your enemies?
PARENTS!!!!

BE TRUTHFUL...

1. Sun or moon?
Moon because to me thats the most romantic time of the day

2. Winter or Fall?
Theres a difference?

3. Left or right?
Right

4. Sunny or rainy?
It depends on the temperature really...if its warm then rainy

6. Where do you live?
Abilene or Big Lake

7. How many kids do you want?
at least three

8. want to get married?
ummm...what girl doesn't

9. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?
Twirl

12. How many kinds of cereal are in your cabinet?
Wait. I have a cabinet in my room

10. Have you ever eaten S.P.A.M?
I have but I can't say that I particularly liked it

13. Do you cook?
I can and would but I don't really have anything to cook with at the moment

14. Current mood?
happy but really dreading going to piano

IN THE LASt 48 HOURS HAVE YOU...

1. Kissed someone?
hmmm...do daydreams count?

2. Sang?
All the time. The better question would be when have you not sang?

3. Been hugged?
Of Course. I get hugs all the time. Give them all the time too.

4. Missed someone?
Yes, yes I do. Wish he was here now.

5. Danced Crazy?
ummm...pretty sure I have

6. Cried?
nope sorry

7. Lied?
ummm...wouldn't you like to know

8. Loved someone you can't have?
In the past 48 hours I don't think I actually Love anybody persay

9. Wished you were somewhere else?
Who doesn't want to be somewhere else. come on give me a real question now. Oh wait thats the last one. Damn. :D

Your Blog Should Be Purple

You're an expressive, offbeat blogger who tends to write about anything and everything. You tend to set blogging trends, and you're the most likely to write your own meme or survey. You are a bit distant though. Your blog is all about you - not what anyone else has to say.

Your Love Number is 6

Who you fall in love with is all about who you trust. Loyalty is important to you, and you want the most faithful of lovers. In return, you never let your heart or eyes wander. Open and honest, your relationships tend to be free of secrets.

Your Personality Is

Idealist (NF) You are a passionate, caring, and unique person. You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals. You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily. Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings. You seek out other empathetic people to befriend. Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships. In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily. At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career. With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone. As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style. On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours.

Your Seduction Style: Au Natural

You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it. That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power! The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism. You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world. Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in. You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you? You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways. Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you. As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you.

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're any good, they must be songs you are presently enjoying. Post these instructions in your Live Journal along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.


Red High Heels- Kelly Pickler
What Comes Around Goes Around-Justin Timberlake
Losing My Way-Justin Timberlake
Blue Clear Sky-George Strait
I Don't Want to Miss A Thing-Mark Chesnutt
If I Didn't Know Any Better-Allison Krauss and Union Station
Perfect-Sara Evans


tag you're turn now:
Danni
Josh
Becky
Rainie

Sadly that is all the friends I have so therefore they are the only ones I can tag *sad face*

So here's an interesting question we got in Psych class the other day. Is there such a thing as a truly altruistic act? Or is there always a reason to do something for somebody else other than just wanting to help someone out? We got into a big debate about it. Some people said that there is always the reason that you do it because it makes you feel better about yourself by helping someone else. I think that by letting someone help you, you are helping them in return therefor the forces sort of cancel each other out, cuz think about it. You help someone not expecting a reaction, but you normally get a reaction anyways whether it be good or bad. And yes it does make you feel good about yourself, but you weren't expecting that person to accept your help in the first place. But, that person turns around and helps you bye accepting your help and making you feel better about yourself. If that is confusing I'm sorry. I had 3 cupz of coffee and it is 2 in the morning so you can imagine the state I'm in. Plus, Josh is coming in and its almost Saturday, so I'm extremely hyped about that.